Two recent gems from the Flathead Valley blotter, in Montana, on 8/25/09:
-"1:16 a.m. Several youths tossed rocks into a yard on Nicholson Drive, thoroughly irritating the homeowner. Authorities responded and encouraged the kids to scram."
Apparently, Yankton isn't the only small town with a "nanny cop". I like to imagine that the cop in this case managed to squeeze the word "hooligan" or "rascal" in there somewhere. But "scram" is pretty good by itself. I also like that the home owner was "thoroughly irritated." Hey, good job, kids....if you're gonna do something, there's no reason to half-ass it.
-"12:58 a.m. A pants-less female subject was discovered near a vehicle parked on Lower Valley Road. Authorities invited the woman to pull up her trousers and move along."
Okay, technically she wasn't "pants-less"....they were just around her ankles. Pants-less indicates that she would have been wholly without pants, and therefore could not have RSVP'd that "invitation" to pull up her trousers and move along. Still, drunken, pants-around-the-ankles street wanderings at 1 AM are ALWAYS good entertainment, no matter where you live.
Coming soon, from Pixar…
2 years ago